My Motherly Spunk

"Look around. Who needs you and your influence? If we really want to make a difference, it will happen as we mother those we have borne and those we are willing to bear with." -Sheri Dew

I have written before about my wonderful mother, so I will not write about her, except to say that she rocks! I want to write about mothers in general and relate a little situation that happened to me this past weekend.

Friday, as I was sitting in a co-worker's office telling her about my new apartment, another co-worker came by on his way home for the day and wished her a happy Mother's Day. And then he turned to me and said "I won't wish you a happy Mother's Day since you're not a mother."

I said to him (in as pleasant a tone as I could, because really what I wanted to do was poke his eyes out), "I most certainly am a mother. I have 20+ neices and nephews whom I love as if they were my own. I work with the children in church and I love them dearly. I teach them the truths about Jesus Christ and try to instill in them a determination to live according to the principles of the gospel. I try to set an example of goodness and righteousness for each one of them. If that is not mothering, I don't know what is."

He stumbled a bit over his words before he admitted that I was right and then left for the day. I took a little pride in my spunk for the rest of the weekend.

So, I spent a large part of the weekend thinking about what it means to be a mother. I firmily believe that biology is only about 10% of what it means. Because let's face it, there are some women who should never be allowed to have children and there are some who are unable to have children but would be amazing mothers. Biology does not a mother make.

And then I recalled a fantastic talk given by Sheri Dew. For those who may be unfamiliar, she is a 55-ish year old LDS woman who has never married. She is loved and admired world-wide as a champion of women and goodness and is an excellent author and public speaker. Several years ago, she was in the Relief Society (women's organization) Presidency for the LDS Church. She gave a talk to women entitled "Are We Not All Mothers". I love this talk! I highly recommend reading it- especially if you are feeling down about mothering.

She talks about the eternal nature of mothers and of mothering. From the beginning with Eve, who, before she ever bore children, was referred to as "the mother of all living." down to present times, mothers have always existed in a variety of forms. I could pick a whole heap of different parts of the talk, but will just share two or three thoughts that fit how I feel about my duty to mother those in my sphere of influence:

-But the Lord’s timetable for each of us does not negate our nature. Some of us, then, must simply find other ways to mother. And all around us are those who need to be loved and led.

-As daughters of our Heavenly Father, and as daughters of Eve, we are all mothers and we have always been mothers. And we each have the responsibility to love and help lead the rising generation. How will our young women learn to live as women of God unless they see what women of God look like, meaning what we wear, watch, and read; how we fill our time and our minds; how we face temptation and uncertainty; where we find true joy; and why modesty and femininity are hallmarks of righteous women? How will our young men learn to value women of God if we don’t show them the virtue of our virtues?

-We just can’t let the Lord down. And if the day comes when we are the only women on earth who find nobility and divinity in motherhood, so be it. For mother is the word that will define a righteous woman made perfect in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom, a woman who has qualified for eternal increase in posterity, wisdom, joy, and influence.

-...righteous women were endowed premortally with the privilege of motherhood. Motherhood is more than bearing children, though it is certainly that. It is the essence of who we are as women. It defines our very identity, our divine stature and nature, and the unique traits our Father gave us.

I honor those who mother, in whatever form it may come. To influence a child is to shape the world. So, young or old, married or unmarried, childless or with a handful of young ones at our ankles, let's do our best to mother those around us who need our influence!